The Funeral

The funeral for George was a beautiful tribute to his strength for his family and theirs for him. It was a true celebration of his life and honor to his family.
My former Mother-in-Law was escorted in by her 2 younger sons, her daughter was led in by her 2 children, then there was my ex. He was escorted in by our daughter and his fiancee was escorted in by my son (I do not blame my son for that set up as he was not aware that is how the procession would run since it just happened when they walked down the aisle).

There was a wonderful song by one of George's former nurses, and the readings were strong and relevant, but the Homily brought it all home.

A week after the funeral, my children and I were visiting their Godfather. He had known the family for close to 20 years. While Drew & I were standing together, their Godfather asked how the family held up during the service. I told him they did a wonderful job, it had been a long time coming and they were prepared for this event. When I noted that the only person on the "family row" that had cried was my ex's fiancee, he was surprised. He said, "She was the only one who visibly cried?"
My son responded, "Yeah, for the whole YEAR that she knew him"............
Yes, this is what I was thinking, his Godfather was thinking, but Drew was the one who expressed that thought
I've never been more proud of my boy!

God Bless George and his very strong and supportive grandson!

Travelling can be tough!

No matter the circumstances, getting to the airport, checking luggage, going through security, all of it can be tedious and nerve-wracking for those who do not like flying anyway. This can either be made easier or exacerbated by those with whom you are travelling.
You get to decide which scenario this is:

To get to my former father-in-law's funeral, I would need to fly down to northern Florida. My ex made flight arrangements for our children and his fiancee. He forwarded the flight information to me so that I could fly down with my children. His fiancee, who keeps wanting to play house with my children, called me earlier in the week to tell me she had bought clothing for them for the funeral and that she would pack their bags and pack Ginny's medicine. (Normally, I would be bothered by her continued efforts to take over my role. She is constantly wanting to pick them up from school or keep them overnight when my ex is unavailable. Considering the custody agreement is between me & him, not me & him+her, I have told him that I need to be the next person in line to be with our children when he is unable to be there for them.....Excuse me for wanting to spend all the time that I can with my children....). Sorry, I digress.....However, in this case, my thought was "You want to pack for the kids? pack their medicine?........go ahead! It's one less thing I have to do.....can ya come pack my crap, too?"

On to the travel!!!

I arrive at the airport and the fiancee has checked the kids in with her so they were in a higher number bracket than me due to their business select tickets. I asked the kids to make sure they saved a seat for me. When I boarded the plane, she was in 1 row, and the kids were in a row behind her with an empty seat between them, saved for me. Now, this happened to be the row before the emergency exit over the wing so the seats didn't recline........passive aggressive or coincidence? Don't know! Because the 3 tickets were business select, they each got drink tickets. Since the kids weren't drinking, the fiancee gave one to me. NICE! Score a point on the good side for the fiancee.

Once the flight ended, the next phase of the journey took place. My ex came to the airport to pick up his ex-wife (me), 2 kids, and fiancee. We all loaded into 1 car for the one hour drive to the hotel at which my parents were staying and where me and the kids would also spend the night.

Well, wasn't that a fun trip! Each of us has our own opinions of how weird that was, and who had it worst. However, since this is my blog...........It's All About Me!!! And, why are my problems so much bigger than everyone else's????? DUHHHHH!!!!! Because they are MINE!

The Kidney

OK, so the kids' grandfather died on Sunday, March 2nd. That was a tough night and I sent the kids into school the next day so they could be with their friends and continue with their routine. Was this a good idea? YES. Was it successful? Well..........
Not necessarily.
On Monday, March 3rd, Drew was playing on the playground during a class which had a substitute. He climbed a waist-high ladder and reached for the higher monkey bars. He missed the upper bars, slipped, and landed on the lower ladder bar, then flipped over it.
When I picked him up that afternoon, he told me about the fall and complained that he couldn't take a deep breath. I had concerns that he may have hurt his ribs, broken them, punctured his lung and would explode at some point during the week. So, I took him to the evening clinic to check out those ribs........
No, the doctor poked around and noted that the pain was not in his ribs, but lower and he seemed to have more pain in his kidney area. He called for a urinalyses.
Guess What??? That showed that there was blood in his urine!!!
The Peds Doc told us that we had to go to the Emergency Room for further testing because he had SIGNIFICANT blood in his urine. The options would run anywhere from "watching him to surgery". NICE!!!!
The decision was to watch him even though there was visible blood in his urine. I spent the rest of the week viewing his urine. Well.........I haven't done that since he was a toddler, but I could see the dark color which indicated the high level of blood.
Who doesn't love spending 5 hours in the ER beginning at 8:00pm?
As long as things didn't get worse, we were cleared to get on the plane for the Funeral on Thursday. A follow-up with his family doctor on Wednesday afternoon showed high levels of urine still in the blood, but 3 days was too soon for surgical intervention.
We were cleared to go ahead with our plans to fly out on Thursday for the funeral..... the flight which would include the kids, their Mom, and ..........Ward's fiancee. I'll move to that story next...........

I am here! I am here!

Okay, so it may seem as though I have disappeared over the last 2 weeks. I have not, I promise. However, I do have much to catch up on. Be looking for the upcoming topics which have happened since I posted at the beginning of the month:

The Kidney
The Transportation
The Funeral
The Gala
The Recovery
The Appointment
The Birthday Party

Did this catch your attention? If so, check back over the next couple of days as I recal the wild events of the last 2 weeks.

PLUS - COUNTDOWN: 8 Days to Bahamas!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Great Loss

At least 27 years ago, my ex-Father-in-Law, George, was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis and shared that information with his son. When I first met George he walked on 1 cane, then moved to 2 canes and was an Eagle-eyed father of a college-aged son.
He gave us heck as we dated, laughed when I "bippety-bopped" across the room and threw my fist into his son's shoulder when he made a "silly statement", and turned his head as he caught us getting to know each other better.
We visited him in Philly when we first got together, then Florida after they moved to Amelia Island, and in Vermont every summer for the family event.
He had the pleasure of seeing his first grandchild, Drew..........the grandson, at an early age. Drew was put on the tray of his wheelchair while grabbing his Grandfather's beard. Even up until this past February of 2008, he enjoyed the visits of his grandchildren. Ginny would try to kiss him, but was too short reach him. He used to say "Pucker up, Long Lips!" So, little Ginny would stretch her lips and give him kisses, sometimes with the help of her Dad lifting her up........but, she was always Long Lips!
For years, George has been close to the end of his life. He said goodbye last year, and allowed organ failure to rush his body to the hospital. He had cancerous tumors in his lungs which should've been the final straw for his weak body.........he made it through. He had organ failure, which caused his weak body to be rushed to the hospital so he could die. He managed to live through each of those.
Last Feburary (2007), George was admitted to the hospital with organ failure. He was inchoherent, and talking about being taken away. George was given a dose of medication which brought him about. The day after his goodbyes, George was eating Pork Chops. This is one of our favorite stories of him and his strength.

Today, Sunday, March 2, 2008, George was rushed to the hospital with organ failure once again. We all waited for word. His eldest son, and father of my 2 kids - Drew & Ginny, flew down once again to be with his Mother. We waited to hear that he had once again regained concisousness and was ready for his Pork Chops. We are still waiting to hear those words. ALAS, those words have not come.

Today, Sunday March 2, 2008 after 3:00 pm EST, George let go of the pain in his body. His wife was by his side and his grandchildren were waiting to hear that he was ready for his next meal.

George passed away today and has left all of us to deal with that sadness. While shocked that he finally let go, the family has to deal with the emptiness of life without him. George is finally able to rest in peace and support his family in the way he has been wanting to for years.

God Bless George Lavino - Husband, GrandFather, Father, Father-in-law, Amazing Strength...