The 24-Hour Whirlwind - The Day Of

*BEFORE READING THIS, PLEASE SEE "THE 24-HOUR WHIRLWIND - THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM" - IT WON'T MAKE SENSE WITHOUT IT*

Thank goodness for my service contract with BGE Home, they told me they could come out on Friday, and it would not cost me a thing to have the problem diagnosed. They would do the annual inspection and cleaning at the same time which might fix the problem. *Awesome!* Wouldn't that be great! Thanks!!!!

I put in the request to work from home on Friday so I could wait my turn for the tech who would arrive at some point between 8:00 & 5:00....way to narrow it down! A rather sympathetic understanding of the need to address the situation led to the approval of working from home. See, I work with people that have also had the pleasure of "home-ownership drama". It just sucks, and we all know it! I went to work knowing that I didn't have to worry about the A/C for the day. I could put it aside, and know that it would be waiting for me to deal with on Friday.

At least I could focus on work.......not so much! The afternoon of Thursday, April 8, I was told that my grant ended in November 2009 (which I knew), and there is no further funding for me (which I didn't know, but was scared of). My contract that goes through June 30, 2010 will not be renewed. My skills, and the things I do are not a fit for the work needed to be done. There aren't enough full-time, project-manager level tasks to justify my employment during times of budget cuts and lost grant funding.
I DO NOT HAVE A JOB PAST JUNE 30, 2010. Well, that sucks!

Sucks though it may, I didn't feel the need to throw myself on the floor and cry, panic, scream. That was a bit more energy than I felt needed to be expended. Good thing I held back.....

When I got home, the kids told me that the downstairs toilet had backed up which led to a water/sewage flood. When you walk downstairs, there is a landing/foyer area, with a powder room straight ahead. To the right, behind a closed door is the finished basement. When you go down the stairs, to the left, there is another door which leads to the laundry room and storage area. Sooooooooooo............ the sewage back-up was in the powder room, foyer, and a portion of the laundry/storage area.

WOW!!!!!!!! My A/C busted, I got laid off, and came home to shit in my basement in less than 24 hours...........now that's a bummer of a day!!!!

*PLEASE STAY TUNED FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER IN "THE 24-HOUR WHIRLWIND"*

The 24-Hour Whirlwind - The Calm Before the Storm

In our lives, there are certain events, or series of events which suck. They are upsetting, stressful, ridiculous, etc. Some of these incidents cause friends to say, "well, you'll look back at this in 5 years and laugh". But, have you ever had a series of events occur in a 24 hour period that would be too much to handle over the course of a year?

Well, let me tell you about a 24 hour period that was so full of shit that you won't believe me. You literally will not believe me! You will think I'm exaggerating, embellishing the truth, or flat out lying. I assure you, my friends, the following is all true. No creative license has be taken to embellish the truth.

After being pounded with chains of blizzards and feet of snow, the Mid-Atlantic region broke yet another weather record. We broke the high temperatures last week by getting into the 90s in early April. It became ghastly hot on Tuesday, April 6th. I had not used my heat in a month and wasn't even CLOSE to ready for the air conditioning, so I refused to turn it on. I put on a fan and peeled off outer layers. I made it through the night, and toddled off to work the next morning feeling proud of my success. Wednesday was another ghastly hot day. When I got home from work, it was 80 degrees in my house, and the afternoon sun was beating through the windows. On Tuesday, it had been just me, but the kids were home on Wednesday.

When the temperature got up to 84, I broke and turned on the air conditioning (henceforth, to be referred to as the A/C). A cool-down was forecast for Thursday evening and Friday so I knew we would be able to head back toward saving electricity for the good of the planet, and my big-ass electric bill.

About an hour after turning on the A/C, I noticed that it didn't feel much warmer. Checking the temperature revealed that it was still 84 degrees. My wonderful son, Drew, checked the fuse box and reset the breakers for me. Thank God that was an easy one.....But, Wait!!!! No, the breakers tripped every time the A/C went on. That was one HOT night! Fans and light clothing wasn't really enough.....little did I know this would be the least interesting, stressful, or difficult thing that would happen to me in 24 hours.

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*PLEASE STAY TUNED FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER IN "THE 24-HOUR WHIRLWIND"*

The Big F-U

Yeah....F-U....I said it, I meant it. Sometimes, there is no other option. There are days, times, incidents, issues that just warrant an F-U. Right?

They annoy, stress, push, frustrate, or maybe even scare you; so, the F-U must be pulled out. It doesn't matter who else is involved, or who else is around. The F-U may be caused by family, friends, co-workers, boss. Everyone ends up getting an F-U at some point, and most of the time...they really deserve it!!!! You may be worried that you could get in trouble for pulling it out. But, you might find that everyone else wanted to put it out there and just didn't have the "oomph" to do it. Taking that initiative may actually change others' opinion of you.

Don't act surprised, don't act mortified, disgusted, uncomfortable. Close that slack-jaw!!!! There is nothing wrong with telling some that you may need to Follow-Up. Never be afraid of the F-U, it might just make your day!!!!

Are You There, God? It's Me, Helen.....

So, I'm beyond the point where my friends have all started their period or I must increase my bust. But, why hasn't Judy Blume come up with the follow-up (other than "Wifey"), and created a guidebook for future phases of life.

And, what about the authors of "What to Expect When You Are Expecting"? What happened to the follow-up versions, "What to Expect When They Are Out"?, or "What to Expect When They Talk Back"?, or "What to Expect When They Grow Up and You Wish They Needed You As Much As They Used To"?......

So, do I have to do this myself? Hmmmm.....my sister is an editor/publisher/author advisor....etc. Mayhaps I should propose this? I can even add in the aspects of dealing with IEPs, 504s, Docs, medical thrills......I've got some personal experience and educational background there.

Regardless.......Please, please, please God....... don't turn me into the parent of teenagers.

They are out there....

There are so many of them. They're all over the place. Some are far, some are close by. They are floating all around me. Zipping by before I can really take a good look, then coming around again, they change...evolve. Some of them fizzle before they even have a chance. It doesn't mean they shouldn't exist, just not right now. Rebirth, regrowth, renewal....always being replenished.

They are out there, just waiting for me. Motivating, overwhelming, frightening, exciting.... they are my dreams, ideas, hopes. As long as I keep my eyes open, there is opportunity for me to see them, catch them.... even if they are only visible to me.

Well, it did something....

Ok, so my previous post was about "how to and what would" motivate me to do something about my weight. I thought maybe I would need to post a picture of myself in workout clothing for the world to see, post my weight, cry and say I want to do this just as they do on The Biggest Loser. I decided not to do that. Actually, I didn't really decide to do anything. But, I have tried something I've been thinking about for some time.

I've got a lot of shows on TV that I like. I Tivo them so I don't have to watch commercials or so that I can watch those that I would miss. I love Reality TV and catch almost all of those. I like the evening dramas, too: Brothers & Sisters, Housewives, Grey's, Private Practice...well, you get the idea. I like TV. I do multi-task when I watch TV. I'm usually doing something on the computer. But, there are times that I'm just piddling or playing around on the computer. I don't HAVE to be on the computer. So, I wondered what would happen if I put a condition on my shows. I can watch them from the recumbent bike. Not all of them, although I'd probably lose 50 lbs in 2 weeks :).

So, 4 times since my Tuesday blog, I watched a show from my bike. It was actually pretty easy. During one of the shows, I did 40 minutes. I don't think this would work as well while watching a soap opera, or Rachael Ray. Those are slow-paced. I have been doing it through shows like Castle, and the Forgotten....those can be intense, exciting, fast-paced, even a bit of ass-kicking being done. Now, THAT'S how to get pumped! So, rather than mindlessly watching TV, I am mindlessly riding my bike....while watching TV. Not so bad. A friend gave me a good tip and suggested that I not make a goal of "X" mins per day, but "X" mins per week. That way, I won't feel like a failure if I only do 15 minutes one day. I still did something toward my goal of 100 minutes per week.

THINKABOUT: Do I love it? Nope! Do I hate it? Not really. Can I do it? Well, I am right now. I'll take that for what it is and keep trying.

How did this happen?

How did I get so heavy? Well, I mean....I know how it happened.....so, maybe I should be asking myself why? And, why can't I get myself to stop? At least I have stopped gaining weight...it only took 3 years and 50 lbs. I've quit some bad habits, but added others which is how I got here.
"Two Roads diverged...." Robert Frost
Why didn't I take the other one? Well, I can't change what I did. But, I really should try to see if I can find my way back to that spot rather than just sitting on the large bottom that I have given myself.

So..............
I'm watching The Biggest Loser because I'm a Reality TV junkie. The big question was whether or not these folks would get up in front of the family, friends, and community with their shirts off, and bellies hanging out as they stepped on the scale and announced their starting weight.

What I really should do is challenge myself. I should post a picture of myself in shorts and a cropped workout tank along with my starting weight. Will that make me do anything about it? Is that motivating? Would people support me, or just kind of let it go because they don't want to embarrass me? I could even allow myself to watch my favorite TV only if I'm on my recumbent bike. I wouldn't have to go fast and furious.....just go, at this point!

Well....I'm going to think about this.....yanno.....weigh my options (OMG, I am funny!). I'll let you know what I come up with.